Many of us - all too well - know just how you are feeling. It's a suffocating, frozen feeling, but your description of "silent scream" is right on too...
What will help you get through this? Alanon meetings. Lots of them. Counseling too, if you can. This site, and others where you can share your feelings, and get feedback. Read all you can about addictions and how it effects the family.
Then, journal. Set yourself some boundaries. Make a plan for yourself and your boys - should it come to a place where you just know in your soul that you have to march on as a single parent.
Right now, you have some stormy skies above... but things will get better!