foggy

AH has been drinking on and off for years... mostly on. His last break from alcohol lasted a few months. I knew it would be temporary (he wouldn't go to counseling, or to a recovery program), and of course it was. He's back to drinking every day, or nearly every day. I suspect he has a bottle hidden again, and that he's drinking more than he lets on. I've seen it all before.

Now he is getting more and more determined to blame me for the drinking. He refused to go on a planned family outing with me a few days ago because he said I hadn't gotten enough done around the house, so he had to stay home and do all that work, and that that was my choice. I said, "fine," and took the kids anyway. He spent the time drinking. (I know you're shocked!) A couple of days later he proposed that he wouldn't drink on the weekend if I'd "done enough" during the week while he was out of town. He was puzzled that I didn't think this was a great idea. Where to start? a. I don't believe him; b. I see this as a way to blame me for his own choices; c. I know he will continue to drink on weekdays when he's out of town, since he's clearly not ready to quit yet; d. Frankly, this whole thing irritates the **** out of me.

I want to sit him down and read him the riot act, but I know I won't get through to him. I don't know what to do at this point, other than go to counseling myself. Not sure how much more of this I can take.