When my daughter went to her first rehab, we filled out a form. One of the questions asked of her dad and me was what makes you think that your daughter is an addict. At that time she had not lost everything yet, but I filled in my answer with: She is willing to lose everything in order to use drugs. Later she did lose everything. It was a feeling that I had because of the behaviors. Now my husband drank for years. He only drank gin and tonic and only after 9 at night. But he always had to have his 3 drinks. As the years went on the drinks became stronger and he went to bed many night pie-eyed. It never caused problems with him as far as work or other obligations and I always trusted that when he was ready to quit he would. One day about 2 years ago he stopped liking how drinking daily made him feel and so he just stopped. He has had a couple of beers once in a while but he has never gone back to nightly drinking. His personality did not change and he never tried to hide it. He might have had a problem with the drinking but he is definitely not an alcoholic, knowing what I know about alcoholism. Hope that helps some. Hugs, Marle