Adore gave some great suggestions, I will throw this one out there, I am not sure which 12 step program you were trying before, but I know in AA there are aethiest & agnostics that have successfully remained clean, sober and happy for many years, for most of them thier higher power is simply thier home group or AA as a whole.
If you read the book Alcoholics Anonymous it mentions that where ever the word God is used that word, and it is a word, it is meant to represent a power greater then your self that you understand, one of my sponsee's with over 2 years sober is an agnostic with strong aethiest leanings (His words not mine! LOL) and he uses AA as a whole as his Higher Power that he understands, he says that obviously AA as a group has more poer then him, because with out AA he could not stay sober.
I am not saying the above to try and sell you AA, but just to let you know that it is possible to get and stay sober in a spiritual based program and still be an aethiest. There are other programs that are not spiritually based, checked the out, give them an honest try, if you find one that works for you let us know.