while still living with aw i attended alanon religiously, often several times per week. i got to know many nice people there. met some whose stories made me cry. recall children of alcoholics that were lifelong alanon'ers. usually crying at meetings.
i also attended rehab center family support groups. eventually i becam an open AA meeting regular. hearing first hand the stories of recovering alcs helped me immensely to better understand my aw. i remain friend with aa members, who by the way, have given great advice on dealing with my actively aw.
other things in my life have surfaced(resurfaced) that keep me busy; hobbies, sports, etc. part of success at alanon/aa is "surrender" why continue to "beat myself up" when I have zero control over her drinking, thinking, or lifestyle.
occasionally i will attend an aa meeting.