Thank you for all of your replies.
It's my spirituality that bothering me. If I'm on subs, am I getting to the 'core' of the steps. Like I said to a dear friend, I no longer cry or laugh out loud from the 'inside'. Is this the subs, or me getting stronger due to my personal circumstances.i.e. my partener?
I'm becoming hard, when really I'm an "ecorché vif" sort of person. Jane, how did you live the steps before and after? Did you 'feel' more? I'm sorry if you feel as if you have already answered this question, but can you give me some examples of your feelings before and afterwards.
Sometimes I get the feeling as if I am talking like a robot and that I'm hard. I don't express myself well. I hope that you can get a glimpse of what I'm trying to say.
Thank you for any replies, this isn't a question of being clean or not clean, it's about the emotions from either. Your input is appreciated.
My love to you all,
Tish x