I had a boyfriend once the first love of my life.He was not a addict but was mean and possessive.My husband is not a mean,possessive person .I will tell you right now I would rather have the addict than the other one.I know my husband with a program can control his urges to use.The ex boyfriend never has a program to work.You may go though many relaspes and maybe not.The sooner she quits being a bartender the better it will be.Take care