Littlefish,
I'm glad you're back and I hope you are working on getting and staying sober today.
What I have found with recovery, is that there are many, many layers in my life that need to be uncovered. And, some of the 'discoveries' have been upsetting to me. But, I believe that these things are shown to us when we are able to deal with them.
You know that your brother is on his own journey. The best you can do is to take care of yourself and be an example to your brother.