Its natural to have a lot of questions when you realize that you have a problem or are an alcoholic. It sounds like you have good support from your wife, I couldn't have done it without my wife. All those questions / anxiety you have are part of the hurt, part of the fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of losing your relationship with alcohol, fear of living sober. That nag that tells you that you haven't hit your bottom is your disease talking. It almost has its own voice, huh? Thats the voice you can't trust. And you have hurt someone and that is yourself. Make this your bottom. Read page 417 in the Big Book, find the 3rd step prayer (I don't know if you pray but it sure helps me), take a deep beath, check yourself in, take suggestions, and hang on. Take care of yourself.