While you are stumbling and feeling like "oops, here I go again", remember you are not the only one on this board who has done the same exact thing. I originally started getting sober probably close to five years ago. You know how much of that I was sober? Probably the 30 days straight I did and then after that, not really. I hear people call that "research", lol!!
When I became ready, I had enough knowledge to know what I needed to do and I did it. One day at a time!!!!! One second, one minute, one hour, one day, one week and so on. They're baby steps.
Sounds to me like you're doing the work and that is awesome!!! I know several girls I was in treatment with. When they were in there I knew they were going to relapse. One of my favorite girls told me straight out that she was going to. You know what? She's had to pick herself up a couple times and she's doing WONDERFUL!!!!
Just keep coming back as they say. I think you're doing great. You'll get there.
