Welcome Barefootblues: I sure hear you when it comes to family and enablers.
I met my sponsor this morning and I had never really thought about how much I am enabling my three alcoholic brothers by providing them with money. So she said, well, maybe you are enabling and it is not uncommon for alcoholics to be enablers and I told her well I know I am still sitting here but I think I just fell off the chair. And am lying on the floor, mentally.
I am terrified that my brothers will withdraw their love if I stop giving them money. How pathetic is that? Well, it is not so pathetic because it is what we alkies do and that is how I learned to be loved: by saying yes and never knowing how to say no.
Now I am trying to learn how to be loved in another way.
Welcome sweetie and please keep coming back!