Originally Posted by
ToughChoices 
From my vantage point, they are two hurting, scared people. She doesn't have a substance abuse issue, but I've never met a more melancholic, broken, and needy person. P actually looks like the "together" one in the match. I would never have imagined that he would seek solace with this woman - he never spoke badly of her, but he made it clear that they fed off each other's negativity and fueled each other's character flaws.
The match just doesn't make sense. Frankly, it seems insane to me.
You could have been describing me and EXAH in the above, only we both had substance abuse issues.
I understand why my parents were devastated when I married him. He was the quintessential bad boy, tattooed, bad attitude, and straight out of the pen when we met.
I was the girl next door, graduated with honors, though becoming tarnished after hubby #1 had divorced me over infidelity, and it was clear to my parents I had some sort of problem with drinking/spending time at bars too much.
I was listening to an AA speaker online the other day, and when she was talking about the companions she had during her drinking career, she said water seeks its own level. How true for me.
Now that you are moving on with your life and making healthy choices, soon to put some considerable geographical distance between you and him, he's seeking that same level of water in his life.
God knows my EXAH soon moved on to someone else when he finally got the message I wasn't coming home ever. They ended up married and were still married when he passed away 3 years ago.
:ghug :ghug :ghug