Originally Posted by
Hopeless82 
Needless to say I reestablished my independence. I only have one question... she has been making it longer and longer without a drink. I wondered about what if she could go an entire month without drinking and was actually off of alcohol. Would I be a fool to slowly see how things work at that time. And I mean extremely slowly... I don't mean to hold my life up until that point, I plan to move on and work on mine and my kids lives but I also don't plan to run into another relationship either. So there is that chance. Should I just worry about that when it happens and ignore the thought until then? Feedback would be greatly appreciated.
Well, I question the independence since you seem to admit to almost stepping right into the mess but....
A month is nothing. 6 months not much more. A year sober and working a program. Maybe significatnt.
If she is serious, if she is truly changing you will know it. Just as you knew it when you reached the point where enough was enough.
In the meantime, work on your own recovery regardless of what she is doing. Her progress or lack of progress has little to do with your own recovery. And remember, it is not fair to your kids to put them back into living with her unless it truly is "better."