I can COMPLETELY relate to how you're feeling. I've have daily pain from Rheumatoid Arthritis, Osteoarthritis and Lupus. . . but lately I've had a great deal of lower back pain and my hip began really hurting.( I am in a MMT, so I do take Methadone daily and it's usually made the physical pain tolerable.)
Anyway, I found out Monday that I have two ruptured discs with nerve impingement (sic) some weird Bursitis in my right hip and low and behold, a compound fracture of my pelvis. This is some serious pain!
I haven't taken any other opiates, benzos, nothing since July 25, 2005. I will be more than likely having back surgery soon, the pelvic fracture has to just heal and the Bursitis is better since I had the steroid injection in my hip. But I have been in serious pain for the most part over the past few weeks. Some days/nights, I am crying so hard because I don't think I can stand the pain another minute. My Mom has about 150 Vicodin here and three different strengths of Oxycontin, but I haven't touched one. I tell myself that, just like the times I have had cravings that This Too Shall Pass and when it gets really bad, if it is as bad in an hour/ two hours, in the morning, whatever, I will reconsider and possibly take one.
But for now, I am not willing to risk losing what I have worked so hard for over the past 3 years and 7 and 1/2 months. Opiates were my DOC, so I don't know if I could honestly just take 1 and then, IF needed, in another 4 - 6 hours take just 1 more.
Right now, I just take my anti inflammatories and sit/lay with pillows propped in places you wouldn't think to prop a pillow.
Let's hang in there my friend!
God Bless,
Judy