Originally Posted by
dolce7dolore 
... For me, right now, it's an impossible situation,...
One of the "brainwashings" that was forced upon me by my toxic family was to see my choices in black and white. Either I played into their dysfunctin, or they would make me very unhappy.
As an adult in recovery I have learned that there are many, many other choices.
You can show up early and leave when your father arrives.
You can show up late and only stay a little while.
You can call in sick (just don't say you are sick _emotionally_ ) and show up the next day. Or the next weekend.
You can see each family member on a different weekend.
and on and on.
Whatever you choose, it's just for today. By this time next year you will be _so_ much stronger and you will be able to see them for Easter and have a good time.
Originally Posted by
dolce7dolore ... They of course know nothing of my pain, but I don't blame them for that, how could I? I'm a great pretender .....
Someday you will have the strength to share a _little_ of your pain with them. Just a little. And later you will have more strength, and over time you will eventually share it all. Just for today, I think it shows great strength, love and compassion that you are willing to _not_ bring it up during a family gathering.
Mike
