I'm honestly surprised (but in a good way!) that this topic of mine has generated so many responses on advice and personal experiences. I thought it might be a little out of place as it really has little to do with the alcohol itself, but I'm very glad I posted this anyway.
I've read each response probably three times and this is helping me very much. I just wanted to comment specifically on a few of those.
Hiding:
"I understand why you feel bad about challenging your dad but it seems as if his ignoring the situation hurts more than your uncle's behaviour."
I was just going to ask if you were British since you spelled behavior with a u, then looked back and saw that you are from the UK. That-is-awesome. Anyway, this line perfectly describes my situation. I mean, I've been living and acknowledging my Uncle's bad behavior for years now, but it wasn't until the other night when I realized that what hurt most was the lack of care/intervention on my parent's part. Especially from my dad. It's funny because I spoke to my mom about this the other night. It's like talking to a wall sometimes. All she ever says is "well, I'm sorry, I just don't know what to say..." it's very annoying that she never has any insight/advice. Whatever. Something she did say repeatedly was that she always thought those comments were jokes, that it was teasing, nothing dysfunctional about it. Ugh, I just wanted to scream at her "what is wrong with you??" Thankfully I didn't.
GiveLove:
Thank you so much for sharing that experience with me, and the comment about how you've never fully forgiven your father. It really helps to know that my situation isn't unheard of.
Escapeartist:
It was nice to hear about how you stood up to your daughter, good for you! Reading that help to assure me that what I'm feeling, especially after talking to my mom, is right. That what happened to me and the fact that my parents never did anything wasn't right or functional.