it's funny that i have a sister like that to my daughters. when the oldest was very young maybe four or five, my sister started criticizing her about her unkempt hair. I couldn't believe what i was hearing! How this fully grown woman would verbally attack my daughter right in front of me!! I said to her directly, "if you have something to criticize my daughter about, you can say it to me and not her". She never did that again. Of course, I don't see her too much anymore. I just figured it was another caustic relative in our dysfunctional setup.