Ago is giving you some pretty good advice. (He's kind of like a older sister, right?)
I was told the same things and I HATED it. I still do. I wish L was the man he once was. He isn't there anymore. I miss him, but he is gone.
You are going through a terrible realization right now and it is painful. No two ways about it. You don't want to believe it, but it is real. I wish i could take that pain away for you. I wish I had a crystal ball, but I don't. Once you accept the reality of your situation, then look to whatever higher power (God, church, temple, your dog, friends, whatever...) and please try to understand that you are not alone. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. We all know your pain.
Keep talking out your feelings. Cry, journal, see your friends, walk, take bubble baths, light candles, do wahtever you need to do right now to take care of yourself. Pamper yourself and treat yourself RIGHT NOW the way that you wish you were being treated. Treat yourself with ove and kindness.
We are here to listen and help if we can
Miss