Oh man, 777... they have all said it and IMO it's all true. We can't control the world. Hard as we try. Addicts know just what to say to make us jump. I know, I did it for years.
When I finally let go and stopped trying to fix everything... it was extremely frightening. I thought I was going thru some sort of mid-life crisis... you know, no responsibilities, just think of me... it was very, very weird. I have slowed come to realize, with the help of many of these fine people, that it's not a mid-life crisis... it's life.
It's about doing what is right. Doing what is right for ourselves. Being caring, loving people, but not at the expense of ourselves. My Dad and Mom said the same things... "we miss you. you have lost yourself. what happened to the woman we knew and loved. what happened to your confidence, shine and smile." Killed me.
Remember who YOU are and find you. He will find his way if he chooses... or not. No matter what you do, it isn't going to matter. He needs to make it happen. Stay out of the drama... it is just to upsetting for you and frankly, he won't give a rat's **s.
All the best.