Originally Posted by
kj3880 
My mom is saying that if we have this rule, she won't ever come to any gatherings at our homes either. She says that because our sister chose him, we are all bound to accept her choice and welcome him in our homes.
"That's too bad mom - we'll miss you when we get together over there."
Seriously, YOU didnt marry him your sister did - you have no obligation to him and do not have to accept his bad behavior. My own parents didnt want my son at their house for Christmas. Its their home and their decision to make who can come into it. I was welcome, my daughter was welcome (and we did go) but he was not. It wasnt because of his drug use it was because of how he had treated me. They were taking up for me and telling him that he cannot treat his mother like this and come to their home.