bostonluv

Hi all,

I was very active on this site for several months last year and was sober from alcohol almost four months. During this time my vicodin use increased. I did the ole switch-a-roo. Swapping one problem for another. Eventually I switched from vicodin to oxy with the encouragement of my bf. Better for my liver, I'm more productive, I can take less of it, etc. You know, lots of reasoning and excuses.

Currently, I have not been drinking and I don't miss it. Probably because I am nauseous 24/7. I also went through a period where I would break out in welts and hives all over my body and face even from very small amounts of opiate (10 mg). I feel like my body is shutting down on me as I can not hold down liquids or food especially in the mornings on most days. I plan to cold turkey it next weekend. I have five days off in a row from the 20th to the 24th. I wish I could do it sooner honestly but I don't have enough days in a row to get well from the wd until then. I started a liquid diet with lots of vitamins to help get my body get in good enough shape to do the detox and be back on my feet ready to work on Wednesday the 25th.

I will need your support and will do my best to support others. I will also need to find a recovery program so that I don't end up switching my drugs or going back to alcohol. I'm scared of course but hopeful. Being ill every day is a good motivator. My goal is to keep my mind more open to a recovery program, to not allow anyone on here to chase me off, ignore the negative and embrace the positive and hopefully live a sober, productive and *possibly* joyous life.

Thank you for listening.

Kathleen