The mind is weird, it tends to find justifications for our bad behavior. I actually thought about buying a six pack then setting up my profile for this site. I was actually going to make my first post a "funny" story explaining how I'm having a few drinks for the last night. Somehow I convinced myself that it was not a good idea and why start tomorrow night when I should and have to start tonight. So tonight I have not drank.
My situation is a bit unique because I work 3pm to midnights. My normal daily routine is as follows. I usually wake around 10:30 in the morning I don't usually have any headaches but i still feel hungover. After waking I make myself some coffee. I usually start to sober up by 12:30 or 1pm but since its so close to work time I basically lose my daytime hours sobering up. I leave the house at 2 pm and work until midnight. Here comes the kicker...on the way home I stop and buy either a six pack or a bottle of wine. Get home around 1am and THEN I start to drink.
This sounds amazing to the handful of people that I confess this too. Not only is drinking a problem but then I get hungry after drinking around 3:30 am and decide to eat right before going to bed. Then the cycle is repeated the next day. Weekends I find different justifications but the end results are similar except i will start around 6pm and drink until 2 am both Saturday and Sunday not to mention I will drink way more on a weekend.
Not only I'm I killing my health I know for a fact I have elevated blood pressure and possibly some form of diabetes and I'm overweight but I waste so much valuable time drinking and then sobering up. I put off things that are important to me and my family, including going to the doctor for my health concerns, exercising and dieting. This pattern has been going on for many years. Every so often I stop drinking for a couple of days or even a week but it is rare. Too many excuses. I find any excuse to convince MYSELF to go buy. I think this is a hard obstacle to get over and I was so surprised to read that so many people go through the same thing.
I'm very happy to have found this site, I hope to become a common poster here. Hopefully I can get through this and then I can start to address so many other issues I have in my life with a clear mind.
Thanks for reading
