welcome....
The struggle when you leave, is the leaving because you expect it to change his behavior.
It very well many NOT change anything- then you start grappeling with your decision. I have walked that walk many many times.
Someone posted a post called "when will the pain stop"
Perhaps if someone here sees this, they can attatch it to the thread for you to read. It helped me immensly.
WELCOME.... you've found a wonderful place to recieve info, and support.
Love,
Cessy