I agree with Alka, just be open with your doctor & anyone else you feel should know. It is so freeing to finally surrender. All the deceiving, the lying to yourself, the excuses, the drama of trying to maintain an alcoholic lifestyle - that takes more out of us than we ever realize! Admit you can no longer dance with the devil. I spent over 20 years trying to have "a few". I never did it, not once - and yet I persisted in trying. I would've done anything to hold on to the belief that I could be a social drinker. (I equated being sober with never again having fun or excitement in my life.) It only feels miserable in the beginning, once you're through it, you never have to go back in that hole of despair. You can begin building yourself back up and have the life you always wanted. Yes, you CAN get there!