The hardest thing for me to learn was that it was NEVER about me, our kids, our relationship or anything else. ITS ABOUT THE DRUGS.
I too wanted to save my family and get him into recovery and live happily ever after. Sadly, even after rehab, he AGAIN choose the drugs. Thats what addicts do. And like Anvil said sometimes right up until they take their last breath.
For many months after I kicked my abf out he was like the bug lite outside in the summer and I was like the gnat that kept flying into the light and getting ZAPPED. I just kept thinking that he needed me and that we could work this out. That is when it became real apparent that there was nothing to work out for US there was nothing to hold onto because US became THEM. Him and his DOC.
Am I sad, yes, I mourn the loss but I also know its not about me. And if its not about me then its not my fault and if its not my fault there is NOTHING I can do about it.
My abf was clean for 90 days and then went right back out there and got back on the pills.
Your bf isnt done yet and may well NEVER be done. THe question is for you are you willing to go down this road for maybe nothing in return?