I don't see this thread as 'us' vs. 'them' at all. My impression was just that it could be unhelpful to recovery from codependency. As a codependent, I know that some alcoholics recover. That knowing was a part of my justification for my own denial. Seeing or reading about recovering alcoholics kept me clinging to the hope that mine would, too. It kept me sacrificing myself and living in a fantasy future where all would work out the way I wanted it to.
What helped me was seeing or reading about codependents who have recovered. People who had the same issues and problems as me and had found a way to live a good life regardless of whether or not the alcoholic in their life found recovery. No, it's not about us vs. them, it's about fantasy vs. reality.
L