I also stared my husband directly in the eye and lied to him about my drinking. He too bought it. He admits now that he was probably in denial and just didn't want to admit to himself that things had gotten as out of control as they had, but at the time he just went with whatever I said. Only once did I ever admit to drinking excessively when he confronted me about it (and really, I couldn't deny it, I had blacked out for 2 hours during dinner time with the entire family). This was about 2 weeks before I finally confessed everything to him and told him I was trying to quit and had started going to AA.
I hope you can keep going to that workshop, or that you can find Al-Anon or another source of support for yourself. It sounds like you really got a lot out of that workshop and that's a really good thing!
I do want to comment on one thing you said:
I keep pushing the AA thing, and it just leads to fights.
So stop pushing the AA thing. You can't MAKE her go, and if you do ultimately "make" her go she will resent you for it if she's not ready. She can't quit for anyone or anything other than herself. You can give her a meeting book and phone number to the local AA office, but that's about it. Once she's got the information, only she can decide whether or not to use it. That's the hard part for you, I know. That's why taking care of yourself (and your kids) is SO DARNED IMPORTANT.
Best wishes to you, LT. :ghug