to least and bosox bunny. i've just finished up 12 days. but last spring i went over 100 days before i foolishly thought i could be a responsible drinker.
i have friends who are. they can go out a couple times a week and have a few beers. i do not have that makeup. at first i can do it but before long i'm buying a 1.75 litre bottle of vodka and drinking from it every night. and feeling like sh!t in the mornings.
promising i'll never drink again. body starts feeling better around noon. light lunch of soup. by 4:00 i feel good enough to drink again, forgetting how i felt that morning.
least.....please stop beating yourself up. you made it 6 months sober so that makes you a god to some folks that stop by this site. if you did it once, you can do it again. i will be praying for you and thinking of you and hoping you can brag on yourself for your days sober in equal degree to how you beat yourself up for your slips. the fact that you stick around here and confess your shortcomings leads me to believe you do want to stay clean.
bosoxbunny, 45 days is awesome. start a new one today and in 45 days you can say, i've only drank 1 time in the last 90 days. that would be a pretty awesome accomplishment for anyone that comes to this site.
i struggled mightily with the urge last night but just got on here and it gave me the strength to not go get something to drink.
and of course your child knew. they're not dummies and they have watched us abuse ourselves. i can't go back and erase the times i'm sure i've embarassed my children with my vodka breath in front of their friends. i beat myself up over the good childhood my boys should have had more than anything.
but my goal is to give them a father in the future that is clear headed and can give them the good advice that young men need.
sorry this got so long but my heart breaks for both of you and i'm here for either of you if you need a friend.