not a waste my friend........just a hard leason to learn.
Maybe you did set yourself up...............your know next time.
And you still have a very strong desire to get and stay sober.....thats a gift from god imo.
Stay close to sr and keep sharing..
Your post will help many to be aware of pitfalls in early recovery..
my thoughts and prayers are with you my friend...........take care of yourself.
trucker