In my own experiences with therapy, two things came through that surprised me:
1) I stayed in painful relationships because I'd been wired from birth to think, no, to KNOW, that pain/drama = normal. I also felt that I didn't deserve to be loved for who & what I was, and that it was an impossible thing to hold out for, so I set my sights considerably lower, on people who mouthed the words to me and then caused me pain. My hurtful relationships felt comfortable and natural, like a warm bath, because it's all I'd ever known. That was something that I had to work very long and hard to change.
2) I was 100% skewed toward making decisions with my heart, and 0% toward making them with my head (I was a Myers-Briggs INFP, all into romance, drama, "soul-mates", and all of that)
Without counseling, I probably wouldn't be here. And if my counselor didn't make me do the work, it never would've "stuck." I hope she helps you to help yourself.
Love is a verb. It's something you DO, not some hole you trip and fall into. You don't have to love someone that causes you pain. There are too many truly good, truly lovable people in the world waiting to be your partner.