This timing is so odd, TSH, because I was recently visiting my fiance (we are long distance at the moment) and I left _desperately_ wishing that he would go to Al-Anon. He didn't "know" I am an alcoholic, in that he didn't know exactly how much I was drinking and my pattern of sneakiness, but my consequences were also his. Now that he's no longer helping/enabling me with my cr@p, I'm seeing that we had a "You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours" deal going on. He took care of things that I f!cked up, and I put up with some stuff I no longer want to. Or like, if he didn't say anything about my drinking, I wouldn't say anything about a mental health issue he has that he doesn't want to get care for.
I wanted to order him to Al-Anon!
Then I realized that would be a very controlling thing to do. Typical alcoholic garbage. So it seems we're on the same page, TSH, knowing we can't boss our SO's around either way. So annoying!!!