Welcome and congrats on your decision to make a better life for yourself.
Something that helps me not be so negative is doing a gratitude list. I think about things to add to the list every day and it keeps me looking at the good things in my life and not getting wrapped up in the negative.
Meetings and a sponsor are good things! For me, recovery is about living a good and happy life.
Good luck and keep coming back to SR. It's helped me so much. Great people here for support!
Love,
Lenina