From embraced: but things like having sympathy kept me locked and frozen in the relationship.
i had to stop worrying about his welfare. he was able to choose what he wanted, and the end result was always the same. so i was spending precious resources of mine worrying myself silly about my poor husband and his pathetic lot in life.
when i started thinking entirely about myself, it felt unnatural, selfish, and cold to my husband. it was the only thing, though, that broke my own cycle of defeat.
On. The. Nose.
I couldn't agree more and hopeangel I am seeing this great theme emerging in this thread which is simply-
What about YOU? What about your dreams? Your life? Your wishes? Your mental health? YOU are worth saving - you are showing a desire for recovery - you are seeking help and answers! Keep thinking about you first for a little while.
The difficulty of putting yourself first and the discomfort you feel doing it is a measure of how sick you have allowed yourself to become....
(((((((hugs))))))) to you in the New Year! I hope you make some changes soon - and begin to spend all that great energy on someone who needs it - YOU!!!
peace-
B.