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Old 12-31-2008, 10:43 AM
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Anna
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,523
Hi and Welcome,

Good for you having 60 days sober! Please know that early sobriety is a difficult, emotional time for most people, so you are not alone.

I wonder if the lying was a result of the drugs & alcohol, or if the drugs & alcohol came along to help deal with the lying. I learned to lie as soon as I could talk. It was necessary for survival in my home. As a young adult, I continued to lie, about totally inconsequential things. It was a symptom of my bitter dislike of myself. And, that eventually led to drinking.

For me, recovery has been in large part about honesty with myself. And, honesty with others, too. What you are doing now is looking at yourself in a very intense way and perhaps, seeing yourself for who you are, for the first time. When I did that, it was very hard to do. A lot of my illusions about myself were shattered. However, there were some bones that I liked and could work with, and that's what I did.
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