wow, thanks so much everyone once again!!
I am also an RN although have never worked in substance abuse unit of the medical facility I work at but I did get clients with substance and alcohol abuse. I am not yet ready to attend Al anon group, I have a newborn on my hands. I am not sure of how much I would tolerate, this is my honest opinion. He had some heavy drinkers in the family, but behavior we are born with along with learned behavior. So if he started drinking late while in his mid 20's shouldn't there be a way to "unlearn" this behavior.
Yes, for now still hopeful, very very hopeful and praying for our family to be strong to keep going.
He went out today with his friends to gym to work out and bowling, perhaps maybe he can be strong enough to say no to any temptations as we have discussed it earlier. what if, he keeps saying no, eventually maybe he can realize that there is life without it.
also, he is considering to make a trip to top of mountains, since he loves nature and just hang out there for few days in piece with nature.
although I tried some illigal stuff in my younger days and used to go out for drinks with my girlfriends, I can just picture somewhat what it feels like, I had a bf before who was substance abuser, you are right rather then try it and trying to understand it need to love myself (and my newborn) he is so innocent little angel.
i am learning to love myself and not be dependent. i do want to help him. i want to make a difference i want to help people in general in my career.
as matter of fact, yestorday I felt sad, as new mom with newborn on hands lots of things get frustrating, so as we talked in the evening he joked with how a drink may make it better, i am really not sure how serious he was about it, but i got tears in my eyes, as he said this would be the moment he would personally have a drink if he were in my shoes. I just turned away and he continued speaking to me. (I didnt' have a drink, I am discusted by alcohol at this point) and I am a breastfeeding mom. So we decided as much as we to give each other breaks from baby to go to gym.......
I understand this is a disease, a serious one, I will try various approaches, I will fight for him, I believe that with love, support and energy from both parties somehow we may win, there is a chance, and I am willing to take it, otherwise maybe i would be gone, I am only in beginning of my 30's just got my career on track, baby, independence........