Sweetie, it's not your fault but you are fairly typical of "the abused woman". Click on this link and it will take you to a thread at the top of this forum called "For The Abused Woman" and please pay particular attention to the cycle of abuse that they refer to.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...sed-woman.html
You don't have to live like this, and staying won't make him change. Abuse gets worse over time and many abused women end up seriously injured or dead.
Even if you don't call...yet...please have the phone number of a women's crisis centre memorized (you may not get a chance to look it up) and be prepared to use it. Better yet, call now and ask them for information that might be helpful to you.
Again, please read that thread at the top and give some serious thought to keeping a safe distance from this man.
Hugs