It is funny how we feel we deserve a drink. My problem starts an hour before finishing work. Hell, I do a stressfull job I start thinking, so yes I deserve a bottle of wine and some cigarettes to help me unwind. So then I visit the bottle shop and purchase the wine, go back to the hotel (as a consultant I live most of my time in hotels) and finish the bottle then go down to the bar and get a large glass of white wine on expenses and this is just about enough to give me that swimming feeling and so I stop and determine to go clean from now on. And the next day the process continues. To keep life interesting I have taken up mountain climbing - it has put a whole new dimension to my life. I am still drinking , though refrained yesterday so only on day 2 but am feeling this time I am in with a chance of keeping sober.