Hugs to you, toltec. This isn't easy, that's for sure. So glad you found us!
If you go back through the threads, you'll notice an interesting thing. Lots and lots and lots of us, our first post is: I want this awful situation to change but I'm just not strong enough to do it.
Slowly, with lots of help (Al-Anon meetings, maybe counseling, this place, educating ourselves on codependency, etc.) we start to take baby steps - sometimes giant steps! - toward that thing we were absolutely sure we couldn't do.
Stick around, read the "sticky" posts at the top of the forum, especially the ones in "Classic Reading." Learn as much as you can. Maybe try an Al-Anon meeting -- they're not the meetings for the alcoholics, but rather the meetings for loved ones of alcoholics.
Think about what you want for YOURSELF, not for him. You can't change his behavior, and you can't change his choices. All the threats in the world can't make him want to go into recovery FOR HIMSELF, which is what has to happen if it is going to last more than a month. What you can do is take care of yourself and decide what kind of life you want to have -- whether you want to live with the chaos of alcoholism or not, what your boundaries are.
Welcome to this community - please keep posting. There's lots of good support and help here, no matter what you decide to do.
Hugs,
GL