GrumpyMel, I'm right there with you. Married 16 years and AW for the last 5 years. 15 year old son at home an an 18 year old away at college. I've done the same as you, try again, inpatient, outpatient, therapy, AA and nothing changes. I decided for a Divorce after an August relapse and she was at the hospital toady with her Mom detoxing. She blew a .40 BAC. I know she'll blame this latest on me because I've mad the decision to divorce. I didn't cause it, I can't control it and and I didn't cause it. Stick to your guns and keep posting. I could use the support as well from someone close to my situation!