earthgirl, In my case I did not tell my AH that I was going to Alanon at first. I went to noon meetings on a weekday so there was no reason he would know. I found that Alanon was something I needed to do for me.
When I did tell him, he let me know that he did not have a problem with alcohol and his only concern was that people would think he did. He started asking me to go to lunch on the day of the meetings. Funny never wanted to go to lunch before.
