I honestly hope it doesn't take away part of their innocence or childhood. I feel if I have the "care free" attitude about their fathers drinking that they will blow it off as well. When I ask my son if he would like to call and talk to his father he says "no, he deserves to not talk to us" and he's eight. It made me sad he is starting to feel this way about his father but in a way it's like his own personal protection. If he doesn't talk to him he doesn't have to hear the excuses. Amazing how an eight year old can teach an adult. So many times I remind myself "out of the mouth of babes". They teach me.
They make me realize that I am good enough. Everytime I hear "I love you mom" or "you are the best mom ever" I appreciate it and yet feel sad that he's not hearing it at the same time....I mean "you're a great dad". I believe you are the legacy you leave behind and when he does die there will not be anything just feelings of "at least he's not in pain now".
As much as I dispise him I wish I could take him out of his misery for one sober non-depressive day and show him the bright colors and the love that could be here for him. I'm not saying life is always grand but it's not a dark lonely office with a bottle of booze.