Addicts can and do get clean, but not until their using is more painful than their need to find recovery. It is a process and one that you have no control over. But you do have control over your own life and it is very important for you to take care of yourself. Addiction can drive us crazy when we try to find the answers to the whys. So welcome to SR and continue to post and read. What will make sense to you is that you must look out for yourself and let your addict do what he needs to do. Hugs, Marle