Maybe I'm taking this detaching too far.
Hi bbd. What do you mean taking detaching too far. It sounds like you are doing the right thing to me. Even if you found out what was REALLY going on up in Ellicottville, you wouldn't be able to change it or stop it or control it.
Maybe just accept it for what it is and let it go - A phone call from your son dumping a bunch of stuff on you that you have no control of. Sometimes we just need that from our moms. We don't expect them to fix it for us. We just need someone to listen.
Just don't give him any money. Love him from afar. Youre doing fine.