Originally Posted by GiveLove

Orviske,

I've never been a mother, and so I can't know how you're feeling.

But I've been somebody's child, and I have been by the side of women I love who have had children, and I really do believe in the power of dreams to guide us.

You say you were born into a loving family. It seems that......you ought to at least consider gifting your new child with the same privilege. The situation you're in now is neglectful at best and abusive at worst...and if you think that emotional laziness and self-centeredness will stop with YOU, I'm afraid you may want to rethink that.

When the novelty of your child wears off, he or she will be the lucky recipient of the same kind of treatment from your ABF. This will be your legacy to your child.

Your dreams are trying desperately to tell you what your rational mind isn't ready to accept yet.

This should be an event filled with intense joy, strength, fierce optimism -- you are launching a new life into the world, someone who may end up changing the world, creating brilliant things, dreaming new dreams, making a footprint somehow. I can't think of anything more exciting. This is a brilliant, fiery arrow you are shooting into the future.

It is not within your ABF's capacity to feel empathy for you right now. How will he treat a child who cries constantly, or requires medical attention, or just needs a hug? "Get away from me, I need a cigarette and a beer" ? (and in case you're wondering, that WAS how I was raised)

Your feelings are spot-on. You are seeing the future, for yourself, and for your baby. To have your feelings treated as though they don't matter......well, I couldn't say it any better than my friends above me, so I won't.

Sending love and strength to you

GL