Hi VR!
Welcome to SR! You've gotten great advice!
I highly recommend you call 211 in your state and get ALL of the state services available to you. Food stamps, WIC, medical care, etc. As far as I know, they will also help you with going back to school and even childcare while you go to school if you are not working. I'm planning to go to school to be a nurse and will start my prereqs in the spring.
Your story is similar to mine. It's almost like a flippin' Jerry Springer show! I'm actually married to my AH for the third time and headed for a third divorce.
I also HIGHLY, HIGHLY recommend that you get some individual counseling as well as hook up with your local domestic violence center. They can help you with individual and group counseling and they can also help you, through Legal Aid, get a divorce.
I think you know this man isn't good enough for you or your unborn child. I regret dragging my children through the mud because I loved their father. That was incredibly selfish of me. I can't undo what I've done but I can show them from this point forward that you don't have to put up with what I have.
A couple of books that may help you while you are waiting for counseling include:
The Verbally Abusive Relationship - Patricia Evans
Why Does He Do That? - Lundy Bancroft
You can do this. You are not flawed in that you are not a good person - you are, most likely, a hopium addict. You hope that your husband will see how good and sweet you are, and how lucky he is to have you. I've hoped my husband would see what a good woman and great kids he has and it hasn't mattered one bit. He has chosen not to get help for himself and while that saddens me, it is what it is.
Here is a link to a very good article:
Are You A Hopium Addict?
Please take care of you and your unborn child and let your H deal with himself for the time being. Take this time to really focus on you. You'll get stronger every day....
Much love,
Sunny