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Old 09-25-2008, 12:32 AM
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brandnewday32
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2
18 days and counting

I've been going through an emotional roller coaster. Fits of aggression, anger, depression. I don't even know who I am right now. I've been a heavy pot smoker for 15 years. Although, I'm invigorated by my new found truth, it scares the **** out of me. I have been stoned my entire adult life and am frightened of what I might become if I don't "medicate"

I know I should read the forums to search for tips, but I don't have the energy right now.

This week I feel like I am empty of all empathy. I could care less if I hurt people, especially my girlfriend. I used to be so aware of not hurting peoples feelings, and now I could give a ****.

Does this go away? I hope and pray that it does because I feel like a black hole. I basically watched my girlfriend ball her eyes out for hours and had no reaction at all. Zero. In the past I would have consoled her by holding her, but I couldn't bring myself to do it.

I've been faking and lying for so long, I don't know what's real anymore.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated
j
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