Welcome to SR!
I'm sorry you're hurting, but I'm glad you are done with him.
I would highly recommend al-anon meetings or counseling. Because you have addiction in your family, you consider it as "normal", even though it's uncomfortable.
You really do deserve so much more from life, and sometimes we need help to realize that. Once we start feeling better about ourselves, we attract healthier people.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy