Thank you all so much for sending me good words of wisdom and advice... I truly appreciate it :ghug3
The night I posted this, he came home and I laid it all out for him and he explained to me how sick he is with this disease. Said he would stop...but he hasn't. I know waiting around for him to finally get sober is the wrong thing to do. My first step is to try to be more selfish! I'm going to do what makes me happy and I'm definitely not going to sit around at home waiting for him to show up (drunk).
I'm not exactly sure what the future holds for me, and I'm probably going to go down a few bumpy roads and I thank each and every one of you who are here for me!!!