I'm late to this post and haven't read the replies yet but we have a lot in common. I get really inside myself when I stop speaking to people on a daily basis. I remember how frustrated I used to get years ago looking for work and then sit in front of the interviewer and go blank. I remember thinking, I'll never gt a job because how can they know it's just this horrible interview process that trips me up? That I'll be fine once I'm hired and the best worker they've ever had. I ace interviews now and the below is why.
Here are my tricks to become UNshy: Practice on strangers. Stretch out your grocery store purchases so you have to go to different places and strike up a conversation with people in line and the cashier, etc. I know how hard it is to do when you have a anxiety issue but it works. In time you get more accostumed to speaking. When others speak to you pick out negative things about them (i.e. they spit when they talk, they have a piece of salad in their tooth, their shirt has a stain). Ok...this sounds mean but it's meant to show you that others aren't perfect either. They don't notice the stain on the shirt, they don't see your cheeks are flushed in fear/anxiety. People don't notice us much as we think. Second, people love to talk about themselves.
The other thing is saying positive things to yourself outloud and also in the mirror: I am outgoing, I am valuable, I am a great daughter, I am a great employee, I have nice skin, etc. several several times a day. Follow this with loving gestures such as stroking your arm, your hair, legs, etc. In time this will become a habit. I bet you say negative things to yourself all day and don't even realize it. That is also a habit. A bad one. I still mumble to myself, you're so stupid, how could you have forgotten that book for the meeting but I catch myself now and say, because you're human, you had a busy morning, it's no big deal Kathleen. The meeting with fine without it. You're very organized. Sometime I even say "I love you" or "I forgive you" outloud. Someone told me to speak to myself as I would a friend always with love and respect.
I started these tricks about 10 years ago coming off speed and I was so broken, fragile and sensitive and mostly I just hated myself. I still use my tricks in my daily life. I used to be paralyzed with fear just walking up to the cashier to give her money and now I chatter away in line and to the cashier. I am seen as outgoing. In reality I am terribly shy and hard on myself and if I go for just one whole day without speaking to someone I start the "turtle" again. The more I stay there the more uncomfortable it is to get out of it. Being shy is like being locked inside your own body and mind with no key. It's exactly that way.
You are NOT an animal and thank you for your post.