"My sponsor told me that while i was living dishonestly, she couldn't help and there was no point working the remaining steps. We spoke once a month at best. She said if I carried on having the affair, I'd drink and I'd die.
I phoned her today, to say I ended the affair yesterday. I feel like crap. She asked if I'd prayed or written anything down. I haven't, all I can think about it how much I'm hurting, and all the practical things I'm supposed to do didn't even enter my mind. I told her I hadn't, and said that she didn't want me phoning her, complaining how I'm low, and not having done anything about it. She said I was free to call her back when I'd put some work in, and she hung up."
I understand that you are in a lot of pain right now. I am really sorry about that.But IMHO your sponsor is trying to help you (maybe not as gently as you'd like). She is trying to show you the tools that she used that got her through difficult things like this. If you don't at least try to use those tools, then what more can she give to you?
Please, go to a meeting, find another sponsor if you must, but start picking up those tools! Hang in there!